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Forum : Socialize : They're Made Out Of Meat

Erophin [be]
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Post: 222
Last track: Swington Funkle
"They're made out of meat."
"Meat. They're made out of meat."
"There's no doubt about it. We picked several from different parts of
the planet, took them aboard our recon vessels, probed them all the way
through. They're completely meat."
"That's impossible. What about the radio signals?
The messages to the stars."
"They use the radio waves to talk, but the signals don't come from them.
The signals come from machines."
"So who made the machines? That's who we want to contact."
"They made the machines. That's what I'm trying to tell you.
Meat made the machines."
"That's ridiculous. How can meat make a machine? You're asking me
to believe in sentient meat."
"I'm not asking you, I'm telling you. These creatures are the only
sentient race in the sector and they're made out of meat."
"Maybe they're like the Orfolei. You know, a carbon-based
intelligence that goes through a meat stage."
"Nope. They're born meat and they die meat. We studied them for
several of their life spans, which didn't take too long. Do you have any idea the life span of meat?"
"Spare me. Okay, maybe they're only part meat. You know, like the
A meat head with an electron plasma brain inside."
"Nope. We thought of that, since they do have meat heads like the
But I told you, we probed them. They're meat all the way through."
"No brain?"
"Oh, there is a brain all right. It's just that the brain is made out
of meat!"
"So... what does the thinking?"
"You're not understanding, are you? The brain does the thinking. The
"Thinking meat! You're asking me to believe in thinking meat!"
"Yes, thinking meat! Conscious meat! Loving meat. Dreaming meat. The
meat is the whole deal! Are you getting the picture?"
"Omigod. You're serious then. They're made out of meat."
"Finally, Yes. They are indeed made out meat. And they've been trying
get in touch with us for almost a hundred of their years."
"So what does the meat have in mind?"
"First it wants to talk to us. Then I imagine it wants to explore the
universe, contact other sentients, swap ideas and information. The
"We're supposed to talk to meat?"
"That's the idea. That's the message they're sending out by radio.
Anyone out there? Anyone home?' That sort of thing."
"They actually do talk, then. They use words, ideas, concepts?"
"Oh, yes. Except they do it with meat."
"I thought you just told me they used radio."
"They do, but what do you think is on the radio? Meat sounds. You know
how when you slap or flap meat it makes a noise? They talk by flapping
meat at each other. They can even sing by squirting air through their
"Omigod. Singing meat. This is altogether too much. So what do you
"Officially or unofficially?"
"Officially, we are required to contact, welcome, and log in any and all
sentient races or multi-beings in the quadrant, without prejudice, fear,
or favor. Unofficially, I advise that we erase the records and forget the
whole thing."
"I was hoping you would say that."
"It seems harsh, but there is a limit. Do we really want to make
contact with meat?"
"I agree one hundred percent. What's there to say?" `Hello, meat.
How's it going?' But will this work? How many planets are we dealing with
"Just one. They can travel to other planets in special meat containers,
but they can't live on them. And being meat, they only travel through C
space. Which limits them to the speed of light and makes the
of their ever making contact pretty slim. Infinitesimal, in fact."
"So we just pretend there's no one home in the universe."
"That's it."
"Cruel. But you said it yourself, who wants to meet meat? And the
ones who have been aboard our vessels, the ones you have probed? You're sure they won't remember?"
"They'll be considered crackpots if they do. We went into their heads
and smoothed out their meat so that we're just a dream to them."
"A dream to meat! How strangely appropriate, that we should be
meat's dream."
"And we can mark this sector unoccupied."
"Good. Agreed, officially and unofficially. Case closed. Any
Anyone interesting on that side of the galaxy?"
"Yes, a rather shy but sweet hydrogen core cluster intelligence in a
class nine star in G445 zone. Was in contact two galactic rotations ago,
wants to be friendly again."
"They always come around."
"And why not? Imagine how unbearably, how unutterably cold the universe would be if one were all alone."
By Terry Bisson
(btw : we aren't just meat ;), this story shows how ridiculous only meat theory is. we are spirits using bodies in this type of density. we are spirits pretending to be finite, or human. life seems so meaningless, and makes not much sense when the spirit factor is denied ;) 
think out of the 3d box ;) matter and spirit go hand in hand...
Akwalek [be]
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Post: 987
Last track: Automated Lifeform (mArtnr236)
really wonderfull scifi dialoogsken mate, danke
Rambastik [be]
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Post: 21
Last track: Mechanical Solution
idd! I had a few good laughs
owen [be]
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Post: 2
delkat [be]
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Post: 28
Last track: Sampli
Erophin [be]
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Post: 222
Last track: Swington Funkle
Originally posted by : owen

WOwen, u honored me with your second forum post, which was wordless, but smiling anyway :)
Meat containers ;)
bandarlog [be]
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Post: 1102
Last track: Sofa so good
Good one!  Nice reading :-)  Reminds me of the book 'The hitchhikers guide to the galaxy' in a way.
mrMute [be]
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Post: 241
Last track: der Drang
a short movie based on this story: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaFZTAOb7IE
ElPietro [be]
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Post: 225
Last track: Space Age
"Who wants to meet meat?"
 haha, funniest sentence I've read in a long time...